Amreeka!

I made some people sad after my last post, so here's to cheer you up Max & Bm :)
(& a toast to your friendship ... )

Never does a day pass, when things happen which makes my mind go "Pakistan mein hota tou, kaisa hota". & then just to feel the Pakistani side of I picture it happening in Pakistan and laugh stupidly to myself, like the other day I was thinking of how my friend "Taylor's" name would be perceived in Pakistan, and the first thing that popped into my mind was "Oye Darzi(Tailor) say kaprey laikar aa" from that day onwards I cant face Taylor without thinking about "Darzis" in the back of my mind, similarly the name "Orange"(that's the last name), sparks my imagination and I picture all the weird scenes in my mind about "Narangis" & "Angoors", and then I reverse the situation, I think of how our Pakistani teenagers would deal with the American drug-o-sexo maniac society, then I realize I was there too once upon a time. I remember my first months in America, when my friends would make fun of me for not getting the everyday lunch table jokes, & when finally after hours it would hit me what it really meant, my first reaction "Astagfurallah, khudaya inn amrikion ko hidayat ataa farma".
As the days passed though, I was well adorned, with American Inappropriateness, and my language changed from, "Grammatically Accurate British" to "That's What we speak in America" and instead of, "May I have a pencil", I'll hear myself go "Hook me up with that pencil yo", or "Shiznit! That's one crazy mofo", greetings turned from plain, "Hey" to "Whatcha up to". & at times I would stop and think as to what I just said and "Damn, did I really say that?" :O. Americans find foreigners real fascinating, as if they were artifacts in some museum, I get a question or two everyday that makes me appreciate, the sense of humor and imagination, Americans posses.

Kate: Are you seeing someone, Oh wait are you even allowed to date?
Me: No, not quite, why?
Kate: You know you can date in America, that Bin Laden creep wont kill you or anything. This is America
Me (Laughing): Why, thank you for allowing me to date in this beautiful country of yours
Kate: Yea, just be careful cant tell if they re gay or straight these days. Damn you skinny jeans!

The opposite sex interaction in US is what got me the first few weeks, coming from a country where if you even talk to the other gender in a friendly-ish sort of way you're immediately labelled & then rumors are made and spread, People in our society would rather watch a Martian land on earth and do a jungle dance for them then approve of "guys/girls" being friends, things are changing now though and for the better :)
The male specie in US happens to be quite interesting ;), from stupid pickup lines to, crazy hair styles, they can do anything for getting the subtle glance from the females, I of course had to deal with the male specie too. But as my friend said earlier "you gotta make sure of their sexuality B, how you know he ain't makin love with some guy". Next day at lunch I got what she was trying to say, when I saw this "person" walking across the cafeteria, baggy jeans dangling metal chains, a pierced eyebrow, shoulder length hair, Converses , baseball hat in one hand and and extra large gray hoodie in the other, and an emo-ish look saying, "Ima cut myself if you look at me" now judging by the appearance you would think it was guy, but it hit me, the "person" wasn't a guy.

Angie:What is that thing?
Me: Its a person, and its kinda mean when you call it a thing, ya know
Angie: Well, I would rather call her a thing then give it a gender, I mean look at it, is she a chick or a dude?
Me: Don't look at me, its your country & your people, I am the foreigner here :D
Angie: (after talking to some people) Yep shes a chick! but she likes chicks so I guess that kinda explains her appearance

That's when my friend Versha Qazi would say, "Acha hai BN, tu Pakistan aakar he larka dhoondna, warna Brazil chalein gain"
That's the only problem you would encounter if you're finding a beau for yourself! Make sure they are attracted to the right gender! I wouldn't even in my wildest imaginations think that I would be amongst such people but fate does some crazy shit to you at times!
and I am glad it did else my life would be pretty normal.